Rock
Scissors
Fuck
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
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