dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Randomize