i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
