i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
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