i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
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