i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
