I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
Michael Bay diarrhea
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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