ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
They left me at home... I'm a liability
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
