New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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