Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
My bed is full of blood and feathers
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
