so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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