I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
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