Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
Randomize
