I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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