Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
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