worst night to have a conscience
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
My vagina just clenched in fear
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
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