yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
