ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
