just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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