did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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