Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
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