Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Randomize
