just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
Randomize
