remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
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