what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
Randomize
