he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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