And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize