i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize