even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Randomize
