dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize
