i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
Randomize
