Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
We got so high we made milksteak
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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