Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
Randomize
