A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
barbara walters just said penis...
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize
