Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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