She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
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