office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
Randomize
