Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize
