im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
His nipple licking is glorious
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
