No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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