pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Randomize
