thus making me awesome and them whores
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
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