I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
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