the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
My pussy is not your playground.
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
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