goodnight i made you a song goodbye
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
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