i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
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