I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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