please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Randomize
