Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
