a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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