I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize
