i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
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